Living With Someone Affected by Addiction
Living with someone who is affected by addiction can be one of the most difficult and emotionally draining experiences a person can face. You may feel confused, exhausted, worried, or unsure of how to help—while also trying to protect yourself and your family.
Addiction not only impacts the person using substances; it affects everyone around them.
At drugaddiction.ca, we understand how overwhelming this situation can feel. Support is available for you, not just for the person struggling with substance use.
Understand Addiction
Addiction can seem complex, and it affects emotions and behaviour. Learning about addiction can help you better understand why your loved one may act in ways that seem hurtful or irrational. This understanding allows you to respond with compassion, while also recognizing when certain behaviours should not be tolerated or enabled.
Set Healthy Boundaries
Setting boundaries is part of the process to protect your well-being when living with someone who is affected by addiction. Boundaries are not punishments or ultimatums; they are clear limits that define what you can and cannot accept to stay safe—emotionally, physically, and financially.
Healthy boundaries help create structure in situations that often feel chaotic or unpredictable. They allow you to support your loved one without enabling harmful behaviours or sacrificing your own health.
It is common to feel guilt, fear, or doubt when setting boundaries, especially when addiction is involved. However, you are giving up on the person. In many cases, consistent boundaries can actually encourage personal responsibility and make it clearer that help is needed.
One should set boundaries calmly and clearly, stating one’s needs rather than placing blame. It is more effective than arguments or repeated warnings. Following boundaries consistently is essential, even when it feels difficult.
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Get Support for Yourself
You are not alone. Many family members and partners feel isolated or ashamed, but addiction is far more common than most people realize. Support groups, counselling, and professional guidance can help you process your emotions and learn how to cope more effectively. Taking care of yourself is not selfish—it is necessary when you live with someone affected by addiction.
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Avoid Enabling Behaviour
Supporting someone affected by addiction often means encouraging them to face the impact of their actions while offering emotional support.
Trying to protect your loved one from consequences may come from a place of love, but it can unintentionally allow the addiction to continue. Enabling behaviours may include covering up problems, lending money, or taking responsibility for their actions. To learn more about this topic and its consequences, you can read this article on enabling behaviours.
Encourage Professional Help
When it is possible, encourage your loved one to seek professional treatment. Conversations are most effective when they come from concern rather than blame, so be sure to avoid any blame or negativity.
Treatment options may include detox, inpatient or outpatient rehab, counselling, or online addiction recovery support. You do not have to navigate these choices alone.
Protect Your Safety
If the situation becomes unsafe—emotionally, physically, or financially—your well-being matters, and it is important to put your safety first. Without protecting yourself, it becomes difficult to support anyone else.
Creating distance or stepping away from someone who is affected by addiction does not demonstrate a lack of concern; it reflects the need for self-protection in a complex and emotionally demanding situation.
Hold Hope, Stay Realistic
Recovery is a process, and setbacks can happen. While it’s natural to hope for change, it’s also important to recognize that you cannot control another person’s recovery. What you can do is access support, set boundaries, and make informed decisions for yourself.
You Don’t Have to Face This Alone
If you are living with someone who is affected by addiction and don’t know what to do next, help is available. Our trained referral counsellors can listen without judgment, answer your questions, and guide you in the next step. They can also help you understand the available treatment options across Canada.
You can call drugaddiction.ca today or request a confidential callback.
We’re here to support you—every step of the way.
Susan Chubbs
Drug & Alcohol Treatment Specialist,
Referral and Consultation Counsellor and Coach
